It’d probably be hard to find anyone who’d tell you that divorcing is easy. Even when you still both get along, it can be a heart-wrenching experience. When you’ve got children to consider too, it makes things even more complex.
Even though it’s difficult, it doesn’t mean it’s the wrong decision. There are also ways you can make the process easier on yourselves and each other. A collaborative divorce may be the appropriate route for you both to take but there are a few things to consider.
Collaborative divorce only works if you both want it to
As the name suggests, the purpose of a collaborative divorce is collaboration. It only works, therefore, if you’re both willing to work together in deciding on key aspects of the separation. For many people this means engaging in mediation and negotiation. This isn’t always going to be easy but the benefit is that it takes away the need for contentious court proceedings. The onus is on divorcing parties to come to a fair agreement on such topics as custody arrangements, division of property and child and spousal support.
How do you decide if it’s the right choice for you?
The bottom line is that both need to want to make a collaborative divorce work.
It’s by no means easy. In fact, it can be hard work at times and is probably going to require an amount of compromise from both of you if it’s going to be successful.
There’s no need for the two of you to be the best of friends. You do, however, both need to be willing to put aside your differences to come to an amicable solution. If one, or both, of you do not want to take part in the process, there’s a good chance it won’t work.
If you have children a collaborative divorce can have many benefits, the main one of course being that you’re sparing them the experience of painful divorce proceedings.
Due to the need to work together, It is unlikely to be the right choice for you if your ex-partner has been abusive or controlling towards you and/or you cannot be in the same room as each other.
In order to facilitate a collaborative divorce and make the negotiations as easy as possible, it’s important to have some legal assistance to help you navigate the process.